Please, God, I’m giving everything I have. Day by day, I’m pouring myself into becoming the best version of me. Every workout, every lesson at my new job, each moment—I want them to build me up, to shape me into someone strong. I have no one now, no anchor. But I want to believe in You, to find in You the purpose and hope that I need.
“I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.” — Philippians 4:13
This strength, God, I know it comes from somewhere greater than myself. I’m empty without You, but I know that with You, I can be filled with strength, resilience, and purpose. I’m reaching out, asking You to fill this void, to be the foundation I need to build upon.
As I walk this path, I pray for her too, Lord. Katarina was my best friend, the person I loved deeply. In the silence that remains, I think of her often, and I hope she’s safe, protected, and on a path to happiness. I loved her, truly, but I see now that I was waiting, foolishly, for her to return, hoping she would leave the bar life behind and find her way back. I hoped with every piece of me that if I just waited, she would come back.
“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.” — 1 Corinthians 13:4
But patience has taught me a different lesson now. Real love is not about waiting or trying to change someone. Love is about acceptance, and I know now that I have to let her go, to respect her choices, to wish her the best on her journey—even if it’s one I don’t understand. Love means letting go, and entrusting both our futures to You.
“For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.” — Jeremiah 29:11
God, I don’t know what’s next, but I trust that You do. Help me to trust Your plan. I wanted so badly to show her the woman I believed she could be, to help her see the goodness in herself that I saw in her. But I know now that I can’t change her—I can only work on myself. Becoming the man I want to be means focusing on my own growth, my own journey, and releasing her to her own path.
Please, Lord, give me the strength to grow, to learn, to find my purpose in You. I know I need to make so many changes, and I can’t do it alone. I need the courage to keep going, to lift myself up, and to move beyond this loss. I pray for wisdom, for patience, and for the will to keep growing. I pray to be a man who stands with integrity, who values his own worth, who holds onto hope.
“Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.” — Joshua 1:9
Each day, I’m stepping forward into a new life, a life built on faith, resilience, and a deep belief that, with You by my side, I can become who I need to be. I will work hard, not for anyone else, but to honor the life You’ve given me. I pray for the strength to keep going, to embrace the unknown, and to grow closer to You. Thank you, Lord, for being here, even when I am lost.