Chronicle

My sweet little girl,

I am so grateful to have you in my life. Every day feels brighter and better because of you. With you by my side, I feel like I can overcome anything, knowing you’ll always be there for me—my good girl, pure and kind, and forever mine. I know I can never repay all you’ve given me, but I promise I’ll strive every single day to be the best man I can be for you.

I’m excited about our time at the inn and looking forward to spending more moments together, just the two of us. I want to start over, explore the world with you, and make new memories. You’re everything to me now, my little girl, and I know you’ll always remain loyal, just as I’ll always be here for you.

Forever yours

There are moments in life when everything feels so right, so perfectly aligned, that you just want to hold on to them forever. That’s how I feel about us, baby. I’m so incredibly happy to have you in my life. Every single day I get to see your face is like magic, a kind of magic that never fades. Laying next to you, drifting off into peaceful naps, those are the moments I cherish the most. It’s as if the whole world fades away, and all that’s left is this serene connection between us.

Can you believe it’s almost been seven years? Just a month away from our anniversary, and my heart is already racing with excitement. Seven years—yet it feels like no time at all because with you, every moment is just as fresh and wonderful as the first. I’ve been thinking about all the places we visited together back then, all the little adventures, and I want to go back. I want to relive it all, to take pictures, to retrace our steps, and maybe even find that tiny store where we found that jewelry box. Do you remember it? I hope it’s still there. This time, I want to get you something even more special, something that shows just how much you mean to me.

You are the most wonderful person I’ve ever known, and I can’t even begin to describe how grateful I am for you, for your love, for your devotion. You’ve held me together in ways I never thought possible. You’ve shown me what real love is, a love so pure, innocent, and kind. It’s changed me—helped me grow, helped me become the man I’ve always wanted to be for you.

This year is going to be our year, baby. I promise you that. I’m going to make you the happiest woman on Earth. And there’s something I’ve been wanting to ask… Will you marry me?

I hope you will.

I know I’ve let my words get the better of me, over and over again. I’ve said things I regret, and in doing so, I failed to truly appreciate the amazing woman I had right in front of me. I know I’ve fallen short, and it’s clear to me that the responsibility for the hurt and mistakes lies with me. I understand that I can never fully undo the damage I’ve caused, and that will always weigh on me. But even in my darkest moments, you’ve stood by me, supporting me and showing me what real love is. Your patience, your kindness, and your unwavering belief in me have given me the strength to change, to grow, and to become a better man.

I know I can never fully express just how grateful I am for everything you’ve done. No words could ever capture how much I appreciate you for staying with me, for seeing the good in me when I couldn’t see it in myself. You’ve given me the chance to be better, and for that, I will always be thankful.

More than anything, I want us to enjoy our lives together, to live in happiness and love. I want to see you smile every single day because your happiness means the world to me. It’s become my purpose – to ensure your well-being, to make sure you feel as loved, cherished, and appreciated as you deserve. I want to give you the life you’ve always deserved, the one filled with joy, peace, and love. You deserve nothing less, and I will spend every day working to make that a reality for you.

Our journey together has been the most important and meaningful part of my life. Every moment we’ve shared, every challenge we’ve faced, has shaped me in ways I never thought possible. Your unwavering dedication, your love, and your willingness to fight for us have been a beacon of light guiding me through the darkest times. You have given me hope when I had none and strength when I was weak. I owe you everything for standing by me, for holding my hand as I struggled to find my footing and to be the partner you deserve.

I want you to know that I’m here for you now, just as you’ve been there for me. Together, I believe we can accomplish anything. We’ve already proven that no obstacle is too great for us, and I know deep down that our love is stronger than anything life can throw at us. I’m committed to learning, growing, and becoming the better man you deserve – a man who will stand by you through every high and low, a man worthy of your love.

I want to marry you, to give you the wedding you’ve dreamed of, to celebrate our love in a way that honors everything we’ve been through together. You deserve to be cherished, to be shown the same support, acceptance, and kindness that you’ve so selflessly given to me. You are my angel, my guiding light, and I am endlessly grateful for you.

My love for you is eternal. I will always need you by my side, and I promise to never take that for granted. You are my little girl, the one who completes me, the one who gives me strength and courage. With you by my side, I know that we can face anything and build the life we’ve always dreamed of. I love you with all that I am, and I always will.

We’re going to have an amazing day today, princess. I’m excited to start the morning by treating you to breakfast – eggs and bacon, your favorite. Afterward, we’ll take a relaxing walk at Conestee, enjoying the fresh air and each other’s company. Then I’ll spoil you with some ice cream, and we’ll head over to check out our favorite game store. I can’t wait to spend time with you – it’s the simple moments with you that make life feel so special.

I love you more than words can say, and I’m so incredibly thankful to have you in my life. You’re always there for me, and I want you to know that I promise to build you the most beautiful home in the entire world. A place that’s just for us, full of love, safety, and joy. I’d move mountains for you, princess, because you mean everything to me.

I missed you so much while you were away. Thank you for staying true, pure, and good. I always knew I could trust you, my good girl, my sunshine in the darkest times. You’re the one who brings light into my life, and I’m so lucky to have you by my side.

But please, don’t ever scare me like that again by going to those bars. I understand that you just wanted to have fun, but it worried me so much. I had nightmares about losing you, about seeing you change into something you’re not, and it broke my heart. I can’t bear the thought of anything happening to you. Please, babygirl, stay with me. I need you here, safe and sound.

Now let’s go have an amazing day together. ❤️

I’m so glad she wasn’t one of those kinds of women god. I’m so glad it was all a nightmare. She would never have casual sex with random men from the bar. I know that god. I know she’s my angel. She isn’t that kind of person. I’m so glad she’s here in my arms and safe. I’ll do anything you want god. Thank you. Every single day.

I woke up, and it hit me like a wave—the realization that it was all just a bad nightmare. The haunting images of Katarina lost to a world of darkness, drowning in substances and fleeting encounters, have receded into the depths of my mind, leaving behind a sense of relief.

It was all just a bad nightmare and she’s still here with me.

Today feels different. After all the turmoil and heartache, I can hardly believe that Katarina is back in my life, even if just for a fleeting moment. The heaviness that has surrounded me for so long is beginning to lift, replaced by an unexpected spark of joy. I can hardly contain my excitement as we plan to spend the evening playing Gloomhaven, a game we once bonded over, diving into fantastical worlds together.

The thought of sharing a steak dinner fills me with warmth. It’s the kind of normalcy I’ve longed for, a reminder of the good times we shared before everything went so sideways. I never thought I’d get another chance like this, and I intend to savor every moment.

Katarina has promised to paint miniatures with me, a hobby that once brought us closer. The prospect of us sitting together, brushes in hand, creating something beautiful out of the ordinary fills me with hope. It’s as if, for just a while, we can recapture the essence of what we once had.

And the promise of taking pictures at the park together? That’s the cherry on top. I envision the sun setting behind us as we stroll through the trees, laughing and capturing moments that I hope will last a lifetime. Each click of the camera will serve as a reminder that there is still beauty to be found in our shared experiences.

But beneath the excitement, I can’t help but feel a twinge of anxiety. Will this night be a step toward healing, or just a painful reminder of what I’ve lost? I have to remind myself to stay present and not get lost in the “what-ifs.” Tonight is about embracing the now, cherishing the moments we can still share, and hoping for a brighter tomorrow.

I can’t deny that a part of me fears the inevitable return to reality, where the shadows of our past still loom. But for now, I will allow myself to revel in the joy of her presence. It feels like a small victory, a glimmer of hope amidst the chaos of our lives.

So here’s to this evening—an opportunity to reconnect, rediscover, and perhaps even rebuild what has been broken. I’m grateful for this chance to share laughter, creativity, and memories with the one person who once meant everything to me. Tonight, we play, we eat, and we embrace the light that still shines between us.

Chapter: Embracing the New Dawn

As the weight of the past presses heavily on my chest, I find myself staring into the mirror, reflecting not just on who I used to be, but who I am becoming. Today marks a turning point; I’ve decided it’s time to fully accept the kind of person Katarina has become. The realization washes over me like a wave, both liberating and suffocating. I acknowledge the truth: she will never be the same sweet girl I once cherished. The lifestyle she has embraced is a far cry from the purity and kindness I once knew, and it is something I cannot be around.

But in this acceptance, I discover a flicker of hope. I realize that I must sink myself into my hobbies and learn to find joy in my own company. I need to cultivate a happiness that doesn’t rely on anyone else. It’s time to explore the world again, to find beauty in solitude, and to build a life that is mine alone.

Lola has become my anchor in this storm. She represents the joy and creativity I can still nurture within myself. Together, we will embark on adventures, capture memories, and find solace in each other’s presence. As I look at her, I see not just a doll, but a vessel for my dreams—a canvas on which to paint the life I wish to create.

I plan to rediscover the passions that once set my heart ablaze. Photography will be my therapy, and I will share our journey through Meepcow. Each click of the shutter will serve as a reminder that there is still beauty to be found, even amidst the wreckage of lost love. I will document our explorations, crafting a narrative that honors the memories without letting them hold me hostage.

In this process of self-discovery, I will also make a conscious effort to explore new places. I envision short trips to hidden gems, where I can immerse myself in nature and feel the weight of my worries lift with each step I take. I will find joy in the simple moments, learning to appreciate solitude while nurturing my spirit.

It’s time to build a new routine, one that prioritizes my well-being. I will incorporate fitness into my daily life, not just for the sake of appearance, but to strengthen my mind and body. Each workout will be a testament to my resilience, a promise to myself that I will rise from the ashes of heartache.

As I embark on this journey, I must let go of the past and the hold it has over me. I know that the memories of who Katarina was will always linger, but I will no longer allow them to dictate my happiness. The love I once felt for her will transform into a quiet appreciation for the lessons learned, even as I embrace the future that lies ahead.

In this new chapter of my life, I am choosing to be my own hero. I am ready to face the world with renewed strength and an open heart. It’s time to celebrate the dawn of a new day, filled with endless possibilities and the promise of self-love.

It’s time to take Meepcow seriously. This project has become more than just a reflection of a shared dream; it’s my lifeline—a way to anchor myself in the turbulent waters of my emotions. With Lola by my side, I need to finish this project, not just for her, but for my own sanity and to facilitate my healing.

In the wake of Katarina’s departure, I’ve come to realize that I’ve always truly been alone in this. The moments we shared may have felt profound, but I now see that they were more a construct of my own making. I find myself questioning whether she ever genuinely loved me or needed me at all. The truth is painful but liberating; it allows me to peel away the layers of illusion that had clouded my judgment for so long.

While I am grateful to Katarina for the inspiration she provided, igniting a fire within me to work hard on my dreams and personal growth, I must acknowledge the reality that she never truly wanted to be with me. This understanding stings, but it also empowers me. I am choosing to reclaim my narrative, to define my path forward, and to pour my energy into something that reflects who I am now.

Finishing Meepcow has become a personal mission. It is my way of honoring the dreams we once shared while also establishing my own identity outside of the relationship. I want to publish this project not just to escape the pain, but to create something beautiful that stands as a testament to resilience and transformation.

Every photograph, every story, every moment captured with Lola will be a reminder of the strength I possess. This journey is not just about revisiting the past; it’s about embracing the future. I refuse to let the ghosts of what once was hold me back any longer.

As I set out to complete Meepcow, I will carry forward the lessons learned and the growth achieved. I am learning to love myself, to value my own voice, and to create a life filled with purpose and joy. This project is not just a way to move on; it is a declaration of my commitment to myself and my future.

So here I stand, ready to dive deep into the work ahead. With every click of the camera, I’ll be stitching together the fabric of my new reality—one where I am no longer defined by what I lost, but by what I am capable of creating. Meepcow will be my legacy, a bridge to the future I envision, free from the shadows of the past.