God, I need your help. I’ve been so lost, wandering in this darkness, and I can’t seem to find my way without Katarina. I loved her so much. I needed her, but she doesn’t care about me anymore. She won’t even speak to me. She’s chosen another man, and I don’t even believe she truly loves him. She’s become someone I barely recognize, someone who hurts me just by existing as she does now.
It breaks my heart to see her like this—drugs, alcohol, casual sex with men. The kind, sweet girl I loved has become everything I fear and hate. It’s tearing me apart, God, because I thought she was different. I thought I had found someone special, someone who would help me, who would be there for me.
But now I see the truth. I made a huge mistake, God. I put my trust in someone else—someone just as flawed and broken as I am. I’m mad at her when I should be mad at myself. I can’t blame her for not loving me or for choosing another path. I just need your help to move on, to escape this suffocating pain I feel every day.
I want to devote myself to you. I don’t know if you’re real, but I have to find something—something that will give me hope again. I want to believe in something greater than myself, something that won’t abandon me, something stronger than the weak, flawed people I’ve surrounded myself with.
Please, let me believe in you. Show yourself to me, God. I swear, if you do, I’ll be yours forever. This pain is killing me, and I can’t bear it anymore. Please, give me something to hold onto. Show me there’s a way out of this suffering.